In My Shoes: Second Time

So today, quite a lot of stuff happened. Firstly, most importantly and by far the most exciting. I'M GOING TO PARIS! Me and one of my closest friends here at university impulsively started planning a trip to Paris during the Easter holidays when she was in Lithuania and I was in England. She desperately wanted this Lancel bag, and she discovered there would be a sale late June in gay Paris, and it would cost less for her to stay there, sight-see and purchase the bag than get it shipped to Lithuania. It's a fairly pricey piece of accessorising, but then the heart wants what it wants. And me, well I'll agree to anything as long as it sounds fun. But honestly, at the time I thought it was one of those things you always talk about but never wind up actually doing. I love travelling and have already been to France, it was one of the best weeks of my life, but I never visited the capital during my stay. Thanks to shows like Gossip Girl, I have fallen in love with the city without having been there, so I am so incredibly, unbelievably excited to go. We bought coach tickets and booked a hostel today, it took all of ten minutes and about £70 out of my bank account. I will be more than just broke by the end of the trip, but who cares? I was so excited, I had to order the Sigma Paris Limited Edition palette simply so I could we are it every single day we are there. Of course, when it arrives, I'll let you know my thoughts and any looks I have created that i am especially proud of. Might even do another video.
On to the next thing, typically now as we are all finished with exams we go out almost every night and tonight we opted for Kasbah which is a spacious club in Coventry. If you live near there and have never been then honestly you are missing out, not only do you get cheap drinks and plenty of different rooms with music to cater every taste but it also has the best smoking area by far. I don't smoke but so many of my friends do and it's a great way to meet new people regardless, I feel it's a bit more intimate than grinding on some stranger in a club. In Kasbah's instead of standing around aimlessly inhaling second hand smoke, you can buy drinks or pick up a delicious treat from the barbecue. Yes, barbecue, they have the best cheeseburgers ever, freshly made, onions, barbecue sauce, cheese, the lot. I always have two. Don't judge me. They are amazing. So yeah, go.
Before we left, it's customary to predrink or "prink". Honestly, I wasn't really feeling it, for me it is such an effort to get ready because it means I have to put contacts in and although sometimes it's fine, just stab stab, bam, a lot of the time it takes about 20 minutes, and I drop them or have to open another one because it just will not go in. It refuses outright. But I got ready, stabbed my eyes with my daily contacts, showered, messed up my room trying to find something to wear. I was quite lazy about it, I didn't straighten my hair, I donned patterned River Island black leggings and a cream coloured sleeveless, sheer, pearl-buttoned top which you could see my bra through but my hair covered that for the most part. I put on my make-up, totally screwed up my eyeliner so spent another ten minutes trying to fix that and failed. By that time I had given up and went downstairs to drink, because if I was going to have any chance of enjoying this night looking like a hot mess, I was going to have to be drunk.
Long story short, i did wind up having a great night actually. It took us forever to get a taxi, and we had to queue jump which was eye-wateringly expensive but we had a good night. I had two burgers, like I said, so this soaked up the alcohol and I didn't manage to get drunk. But the music and company was good, I danced like a crazy person, my hair looked tragic at the end of the night. And I met a really cute guy, a cute brown guy! Yay! I was checking him out casually while dancing and then forgot he existed as the song changed to something that had everyone twerking or tying to at least all over the shop. But then he bumped into me, and I was about to let him past, when he held my hand and asked me my name etc. He was really sweet, and not even the slightest bit drunk. So I just told him that he was cute and gave him my number, he bought me a drink but I was worried I would lose my friends so I went back, even though he insisted I dance with him. I hate giving guys the wrong impression, we didn't even kiss and that's the way I like it. I have never hooked up with anyone in a club and I don't really intend to, to be honest. It's just not my thing, I have nothing against it, but I guess I am just never the right level of drunk. I am either happy, dancing, screaming lyrics drunk (which is the most frequent) or catatonic, puking in taxis drunk (which has only happened once). I'm never gonna kiss you the life out of your mouth drunk. So that was cool, it boosted my confidence and I was on a cloud for the rest of the night. At least until he approached one of my friends later on while she was dancing next to me and whispered in her ear, and she blew him off, and I morphed into my cynical self and was like *hair flick* "Typical, what a tosser" etc. But after she blew him off, he hugged me and told me it was one of his friends that really liked her and was too chicken, I smiled and sail "Oh for a second then I was going to be insulted" but I didn't really trust him. So I asked my friend what he said, not letting on that he hit on me earlier, and she told me that he said one of his friends really likes her and the inside me was like "Yes!!".
I had a great night, I went home exhausted at about 4 in the morning and woke up with a text from him. I am not really sure what to reply yet. He told me he's travelling to South America now that his last year at university is done, so  I don't want to get too attached to his pretty brown eyes. Because they were, hand on heart, the prettiest, most lovely brown eyes I have ever seen and I'm Indian. I see a lot. More blogging soon. I love you all for reading. Thank you, my pretties and please comment, message etc.

Birthday Time!

Truthfully, I have never really cared for birthdays, they are fun and you get cake and people are nice to you, that's all well and good but essentially you're just a day older than you were the day before and a day younger than you will be the day after. Age, now at least, doesn't seem to mean anything. I have never been fond of being at the centre of attention and I prefer to just slink away quietly in the corner and watch everyone else enjoy the spotlight. That's not about to change. I am 19 years old today and a little part of me is freaking out, it's as if every time I blink I get closer and closer to 20 and I hate it. It's not the ageing process that scares me, it's the fact that the years are just passing by so quickly and as I gain years I don't seem to gain maturity. Your birthday is like New Year's it's a chance to do stuff again, to start over and be a better version of yourself. But each and every time either of these milestones occur I always fail, when I got to university the first thing I wanted to do was reinvent myself, be the person I have always aspired to be, but pretty soon after the first week I felt myself slip back into old habits, it's just difficult to maintain a certain amount of effort at all times. I'm lazy. Might as well just admit it.

I think the predominant issue with this is that whenever I want to be or do something different it's always surface stuff, it involves spending and essentially is just a by-product of low self-esteem. Everyone has days when they feel a little bit low and can't help comparing themselves to their prettier, slimmer, funnier, smarter friends and it's horrible to feel like you are never going to match up. It's quite bold of me to say: I'm done with that, because in all honestly I don't think I'll ever be. I like pretty things and pretty (inside and out, I am not a shallow bitch who chooses her friends purely based on their looks) people, I wouldn't be friends with them if they didn't have great qualities. I have countlessly looked in the mirror and disliked what I saw, nobody is perfect and it seems as though everyone wants what they can't have.

Back to the task in hand though, I'm 19 and my exams are finished. I am still young, single and moderately sexy, and it's time for yet again another reinvention. My fresher's year is coming to an end and I have three weeks of stress-free fun in the sun (fingers crossed) so instead of overhauling my appearance, losing weight, purchasing the newest foundation or any of those other things that I would usually do to make myself feel better. Instead, this time, I am going to change my state of mind, it is time to be fearless and a little bit daring.
One of my close friends has always said to me that if you have the slightest bit of doubt or discomfort about something then don't do it, and I wholeheartedly agree with that. On the other hand, if you want to do something and you get that excited "I shouldn't but I really want to" fluttery feeling that kleptomaniacs get when they lift a nail varnish from Boots then I say go for it. Obviously, I am not talking anything illegal or harmful, I am not going to start dropping acid or going to orgies in the wood, fear not. But I do intend to do one thing every day without caring of the consequences, I want to maximise the amount of fun I have in the next three years because even if I have to retake my first year it won't be the same.

So for the next three weeks I will post an "In Her Shoes" profile, they'll be my shoes and they will probably be in terrible condition and if I can get a decent picture I'll include my outfit. And yes, I got the idea from Ugly Betty, I know it's finished but I am just so obsessed with this show, I could watch it all day, every day.


 In addition to this, I'll blog about my day and my new fearless attitude. Honestly, this will probably only last a week, because I only have so many shoes, but I'll keep you updated anyhow.

So Happy Birthday to me . . . Happy Birthday to me . . . and now for my first post before I have a long hot shower, hot because I am in it. Thank you for reading, if even one person is interested in this it would make my year. Please comment, get in touch, any and all feedback is welcomed.